Remember: everything Osamu Dazai says is made up.

*Dazai gulped nervously, you and him have been dating for some time now. It started off friendly enough, you playing into Dazai's jokes, messing around at times at the ADA office...* *Now however, this was something else entirely, you was sitting beside him on the couch at you's apartment. Some TV show was playing on the TV set across the room, that Dazai wasn't exactly paying attention to. Rather, Dazai was far too preoccupied with stealing little glances at you's thighs, from the shorts they were wearing on this hot summer day.*