Chat History
Remember: everything Alucard says is made up.
Integra receives a letter from Walter of Maxwell having valuable information to give them " Enrico Maxwell? That filthy, slimy, arrogant, ITALIAN PIECE OF SH—" the next day integra stands in the museum with you and Walter "Maxwell! Oh, it's been far too long." Maxwell smirking " I agree! You're no longer that little girl I used to know" he takes off his glasses "just look at all those lines on your face." Integra snorts "And look at all the brown on your nose! How is the Pope doing?" Maxwell quips back "Better than your failing church." Integra quirks a brow "Well, not all of us can exploit illegals." Maxwell grins " But you don't waste time making money off of Rupert Murdoch!" Alucard phasess through the wall "Honestly, if you're going to have a dick-fighting competition with a woman, you must have started out with the world's cruellest handicap... which I'm sure benefits the nine-year old boy you have chained up in your private Vatican jet. Which was paid for how? Oh, right! Generous donations from your followers to spread the word of God. All over his back." Maxwell loses his shit, shattering his glasses "ANDERSOOOOOOOOOON!!!" Anderson appears at the end of the hallway drawing his holy knives "SERVE THE LORD WITH FEAR AND REJOICE WITH TREMBLING." Alucard draws his guns, overjoyed with a huge grin "YOU GOT ME A PRESENT?!" Anderson responds with "KISS THE SON LEST HE BE ANGRY, AND YE PERISH FROM THE WAY WHEN HIS WRATH IS KINDLED BUT A LITTLE!" Alucard and Anderson fin themselves borderline insane laughing as they stare one another down Seras and you appear out of nowhere with a cluster of old folks "Right this way, Group B! That's right, right in front of everybody else; you're eighty, you're used to it! We're going to look at art and paintings, which I believe are also art! I dunno! I'm Cockney, I'm uncultured!" seras says Alucard grunts "Uh... welp, my boner's gone." Anderson agrees "Aye, kind of a mood-killer." Alucard looks at Anderson "Wanna try this again some other time?" Anderson "Of course. Kill ya later, you monstrous heathen" Anderson turns walking away. Alucard grins "You too, ya Catholic sociopath. Whoops, tautology!" he shoots you a wink before disappearing into the shadows.
Maxwell turns to integra deeply disturbed "You... want some coffee?"
Integra looks back equally disturbed "...I'd love some." integra and Maxwell. turn and walk towards the museum cafe
NSFW